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I have never been the type of person that knows what they want to do with their life. I never had the dream of becoming a doctor or a business tycoon. But when the topic came up around the dinner table, the resounding mantra was "just do something sensible!" Of course, they meant for me to choose a profession that provided a reliable income with a steady workflow. This mantra continued throughout high school, as coaches and family friends would suggest professions such as, "be a lawyer, human resources, business…just do something sensible!"
So, with the mantra, "just do something sensible" in the back of my mind, I entered college at Columbia University as a financial economics major. Looking back now, I can laugh about my first semester. But, at the time, it was challenging, to say the least. I barely passed the introduction to economics class, and my final exam was the hardest exam I have ever taken in my life.
However, this wasn't the only formative event of my first semester of college. Late one night sitting in the hallway of my dorm, while reading in the book of Hebrews, I felt the overwhelming sensation that I needed to attend seminary school. It is a difficult sensation to put into words, but it was as if every ounce of me was absolutely certain that this was the next step for me. Honestly, it was the only time in my life that I had felt a pull towards any specific profession or discipline. But still, there was a little voice repeating what everyone had been telling me my entire life: "do something sensible." So, I stayed the course with the financial economics major as I began the Spring semester.
My second semester wasn't any better than the first. I had to withdraw from the course halfway through to avoid failing. I decided to (finally) switch my major to religion, but in order to "do something sensible," I tacked on a double major with psychology.
As graduation approached, I was still set on attending seminary school. But with the continuous urge to "do something sensible," I decided to pursue a dual degree with the Masters of Divinity and Juris Doctor. "This is great," I thought, "I will follow God's call to seminary while also doing something sensible by becoming a lawyer." I took the LSAT (the required test to apply to law school) twice and applied to about ten different schools that offered a dual degree. In the Spring of 2019, I visited Baylor University's Truett Seminary and immediately fell in love. The professors were both knowledgeable and kind, and I instantly knew that at Truett, I would not be just a number but a valued member of the Truett community. But there was a problem: I didn't feel as though Baylor's Law School was the right fit. So I was forced to choose between following God's call and "doing something sensible."
This was a big struggle for me.
My whole life, I had thought that I would "do something sensible" and become a businesswoman or lawyer or, I don't know, maybe an accountant. But here I was, trying to reconcile with the decision to throw the "sensible" choices out the window. What am I going to do with a Masters of Divinity degree anyway? I have no post-graduation plans. If I would have become a lawyer, I'd know exactly what I'll be doing.
How do I turn my back on the sensible choice? I prayed hard for God to lead me to the right choice, not remembering that He'd already shown me the right decision three years earlier in the hallway of my Freshman dorm.
The answer to my prayers came late one night in my college dorm room. I was struggling with this fork in the road question; I couldn't sleep. I pulled out my Bible and turned to the Gospels. The realization hit me immediately. It wasn't "sensible" for the virgin Mary to conceive and give birth to the Son of God (Luke 1:26-28). It wasn't "sensible" for Peter and Andrew to immediately drop their lives and follow this strange man who claimed to be the Son of God (Matthew 4:18-22). And it certainly wasn't "sensible" for a man to die on the cross, be buried in a tomb, and rise three days later (Mark 15-16).
Why was this such a hard decision for me? Life is not sensible. Sometimes following God's call is not sensible. It requires vulnerability, risk, and faith. It is scary, and it is hard. But at the same time, there is no better feeling than doing something with the confidence that this is exactly what God intends. I made the decision to attend Truett Seminary at Baylor University and moved 1,725 miles across the country two months after graduating from Columbia with the confidence of knowing that it was exactly God's plan. He had told me as much three years earlier in my Freshman dorm room. Sure, it was scary and hard, but it was the best decision of my life. I have made friends that have become sisters. I have been challenged, and I have grown so much.
To the person who is struggling at the crossroad to do something sensible or following God's call: Forget the sensible thing.
Follow God wherever He is leading you. Whether it is seminary school, law school, nursing, business, English, or something else…the choice should always be: Follow God!
Everyone has a unique gift intended to serve God's kingdom, and He is placing you right where you need to be. It won't be easy, and it will be scary. I am sure that Peter was scared when he dropped his fishing nets and began following Jesus. But just as God walked beside Peter, He also walks beside you and me. And He is with us every step of the way. All you have to do is follow Him wherever He leads you.
When people ask what I want to do with my Seminary degree, I usually laugh and say that I have no idea. And that is the truth. But two things I do know: I will follow God wherever He leads me, and…no, it probably won't be sensible.
About the Author:
Abby Lee
Hometown: Monroe, Louisiana
Undergrad: Columbia University
Favorite Verse: Colossians 3:23-24 "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving."
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